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It is indeed surprising that when polled almost 35% people could recount at least one incident when they went on a date to a lonely place in a vehicle that was not their own with a person they were dating for the first time. Most are plain lucky to have got out of those situations unscathed, what with incidents of robbery, stalking and date rape increasingly hitting the headlines. When danger is ever present why don’t people play safe? Marion Keyes, who runs a security agency says that it boils down to psychology. In our minds we don’t equate caution with fun and dating is supposed to be fun. In a bid to enjoy ourselves we often take risks and do things we would not normally do. As a result we expose ourselves to danger.
While dating is about having fun, it is extremely important to stay safe while dating. Safety, however does not have to be a spoiler. You don’t have to arm yourself with a gun or be accompanied by an army of bodyguards, nor do you have to necessarily get a private detective to screen every prospective date. Just follow the ‘precaution list’ our set of experts has come up with and you will be ready to swing around the town without landing into situations that could get you robbed, maimed or killed!
Tell Someone
This is the most important rule, and yet the one that most people ignore because they are too embarrassed to tell someone to look out for them says Sharon Marlow who runs a dating agency. If you are going out on a date make sure someone knows your itinerary and calls you at your home or your office (not on your hand phone), at the time you are scheduled to be back, to ensure you got back safe. This includes dates set up through friends and people you met at a party earlier, and not only dates set up online. Strictly speaking the level of risk is the same and just because you said hi to a bloke/ babe at a party does not mean you know him/her.
Drive your own vehicle
Arrive in your own vehicle. This is important for two reasons. Firstly, it helps you to not give out your address to someone you don’t know. Secondly, it ensures you won’t be driven off to a lonely corner of town and ambushed. If that is unmanageable ask a friend to drop in and pick you up. Seeing that you have people around you whom you can trust often fends of people who may not have the best intentions.
Set a start and an end time
It is imperative that you have a set start and end time for the date. If you don’t like the person it will be a relief to walk away without spending interminable hours with them. If you like the person it will keep you from looking desperate and ignite greater interest from your date. From the safety perspective it will keep you to a known schedule and will enable a friend to track you easily.
Meet for lunch at a public place
Never agree to meet anyone at their house for the first few dates. Meet at a public place. Also try to meet for lunch as it is much safer than the dinner alternative and much quicker too. A short meeting for coffee is equally good.
Watch what you eat and drink
It is important be alert to what you are eating and drinking especially if your date is serving you. Do not drink alcohol and do not leave the table with your drink still filled. If you have to go to the washroom, ask for a fresh drink when you return. Unfinished drinks are the easiest to pour drugs into. Remember that paranoia may be what keeps you from becoming unconscious and being mugged in the process.
Watch out for Red flags
If you listen carefully red flags are easy to spot. If there are inconsistencies in what the person told you online or on the phone and what they are saying now don’t take time to be nice. Just make an excuse and leave.
‘You are in control’
If you feel uncomfortable remind yourself that you are the one in control. At no point should anyone be able to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do. Safety is not as much about logic as it is about comfort. If you think you are uncomfortable but can’t pinpoint the reason, your sixth sense may be trying to tell you something. Listen to that voice in your head telling you to scoot. It will rarely lead you down the wrong path!
Follow these precautions for the first few dates with anyone and you’ll never land up in a sticky situation! |
Copyright 2005. All rights reserved
Britney Holloway writes for Singles Dating 247 . com - If you are single and looking for love then this is the site for you. Articles, Reviews and Links to the best sites on the Internet.
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